| Title | Score |
|---|---|
| ==> | 321 |
| Dave: Hide evidence in microwave. | 339 |
| A mother will do whatever is best for her children. | 322 |
| Insert disc 2. | 318 |
| Rose: Refuse to acknowledge the absurd kitten. | 327 |
| OPEN CHEST. | 360 |
| ======> | 328 |
| ==> | 345 |
| dear jade, | 325 |
| KISS HER | 323 |
| Rose: Look for mad scientists. | 409 |
| WV: Captchalogue can of custard. | 323 |
| ==> | 324 |
| Dave: Look out window. | 350 |
| Jade: OH GOD HURRY UP AND GO KISS THE GIRL YOU WIMP | 341 |
| Jack: Kill John's dad yourself. | 321 |
| WV: Deappearify the pumpkin. | 349 |
| ======> | 324 |
| END OF ACT 1. | 323 |
| John: Be the huge bitch. | 327 |