| Title | Score |
|---|---|
| ==> | 216 |
| Dave: Hide evidence in microwave. | 248 |
| A mother will do whatever is best for her children. | 221 |
| Insert disc 2. | 218 |
| Rose: Refuse to acknowledge the absurd kitten. | 227 |
| OPEN CHEST. | 262 |
| ======> | 229 |
| ==> | 250 |
| dear jade, | 227 |
| KISS HER | 226 |
| Rose: Look for mad scientists. | 290 |
| WV: Captchalogue can of custard. | 216 |
| ==> | 220 |
| Dave: Look out window. | 241 |
| Jade: OH GOD HURRY UP AND GO KISS THE GIRL YOU WIMP | 245 |
| Jack: Kill John's dad yourself. | 226 |
| WV: Deappearify the pumpkin. | 245 |
| ======> | 226 |
| END OF ACT 1. | 220 |
| John: Be the huge bitch. | 229 |